No time to slip into stretch pants,
Remember to check your watch.
For twenty seconds, fall forward
into Uttanasana. Touch the floor tiles.
In them, you see a pattern like
the line graph in your next presentation.
Isn’t that enlightening?
Roll upward, vertebrae by vertebrae.
For thirty seconds, sink into Utkatasana.
Chair pose. The one you’ve perfected,
for twenty years, over coffee.
Time for your first downward dog.
They say those get easier by the end.
Maybe you could optimize this process
by performing repeated downward dogs—
only downward dogs, an assembly line
of downward dogs. You could propose this,
PowerPoint style, to yellow-robed yogis
sharp as the Tibetan winds.
You might picture them nodding
shaved heads, whispering like children
when they earn their first dollar:
whispering about your enlightening presence
your professional diction
your pedestal of BA, MBA, and PhD—
(how beautiful it is when it shatters)
— Rachel Thompson